The sweltering heat recalls a time to me so dearly as I gaze upward to the heavens, searching for something. The song Remember When comes to play inside my head as I feel tears falling down my face, thinking about you. You're gone from my side, leaving a cold and harsh void where we should be holding each other, recalling the good times. No matter what anyone says to me, whether it be to tell me it'll be all right or that I need to move on, can fill that void.
How can I? How. . .the pitter patters of rain falling on the metal outbuilding, the rushing little feet, hearing the voices that they belonged to. God. I miss you. More than what you really know or what I must know. No longer can I feel your supporting hands, pulling me back up. No longer can I come to you with my darkest times and tell you what I feel. I can't even hold you or you hold me. It is my curse that I shall for all time and only to have you in memories alone. What cruel fate.
I wish I could have saved you the first time and wish I had been there the night before you flew to the skies. Your children, my husband, NO ONE will ever share what we had. My sister...why do you have to be gone? WHY. Please, cruel fates, give me another chance. Let me have five minutes with her. Let me hold her.
I know you would whisper and yearn for me to be happy, but alas, how can I be? The closet thing I really did have as a sibling was you. I can see your house from where I stand. No doubt the husband will come along side me and wipe the tears, but they'll remain for you remain.
Your presence is on this path. I know it. When it rains, I feel your tears. When it the sunlight touches my skin, it is your hand touching my face, it's you smiling. When I see the sunrise, it is you greeting me. The sunset is you fading again, but red to tell me that you love me. I can never say goodbye. NEVER.
If it is meant that our paths will never meet again, I know you'll be with me. Forever. Live long and prosper, shining and guiding star. Never fade. I know I won't for I have you to show me the way.